I Know It's Only September

The weather's really cooled around here over the past week, and the tips of the leaves on our maple tree are starting to orange, enough that it's obviously turning into fall. Which means.... Halloween is almost here! As far as holidays go this one's always been my favorite, the holiday I anticipate more than my birthday or Christmas or even Pulaski Days. All that candy! All the costumes! And, now that I'm an adult, I can indulge in the best Halloween pastime ever: scaring the crap out of 12 year old pumpkin smashers who should be at home where they belong and not out running the streets like a bunch of punks. The pumpkin smashers belong in the same group as the kids who steal other kids' candy, along with the little weenies who take more than their share out of the buckets people leave on their porches when they get sick of having to look surprised at every Cinderella and Spiderman. I march around every year trying to catch those kids. It's the fear in their eyes that I love to see, the look of horror you get indicating what they're sure of: that this crazy woman in front of them with the kid on her hip is going to call the police and they're not only not getting any candy, but they're going to spend the rest of their life in prison, too. I really aim for that level of terror. You know, so they won't do it again. Consider it a public service. Halloween is for little kids. There should be a participation age limit, and those kids should be over it. Anyway, last year Eddie was The Human Torch and Rosie was a bee: Click for more. Ed was a trooper. He ended up with a nearly full pillowcase of goodies, most of which Clint and I ended up eating after Eddie passed out from exhaustion at the tail end of a serious sugar buzz. The bag he's holding in that picture was full within 20 minutes; the pillocase was in addition to that bag. Rosie, on the other hand, was NOT into it. I don't understand why. Being out two hours past bedtime in the freezing cold dark, plodding around dressed in something bulky and uncomfortable doesn't sound like fun? What if you were accompanied by a bunch of people you don't know wearing scary costumes? Or what about the flaming, evil eyed pumpkins? Or the scary sound tapes? I can't imagine what she was fussing about. This year, though, I'm hoping she'll get the costume = candy thing and will be a little more willing to participate. I'm going to start prepping her now. After dark tonight we're hitting the neighbors' houses. I hope they have candy stocked already. If she's still not buying it, there's no reason she can't help me bust the pumpkin smashers. She gives a damn good evil eye. I think the glare of a toddler might take their fear to a whole new level, actually. It works for her around here.